Premarital sex-- immoral?

[Vincent]

Originally Posted by magister

I think it's wrong, but in this day and age it's understandable.

How about...

Mass immigration is wrong, but in this day and age it's understandable. Problem solved!

It's not that I'm against premarital sex, but isn't this phrase 'day and age it's understandable' an oversimplification, in any case?

[Menydh]

I don't think that premarital sex is intrinsically inmoral. One of the reasons behind marriage is to elevate relations between a man and a woman to a status higher than that of free will among animals.

It is not inmoral the case where premarital sex is practised by a couple with a healthy established relation, in principle. But being realistic, a loose view on such issues has led modern society to lower premarital sex to the levels of animals free will.

[Martín Zalacaín]

It is harmful for society, imo. Sex before marriage raises the odds of single mothers, which is dangerous for society if it becomes a major trend. Furthermore, premarital sex is usually a means to obtain pleasure, with no desire to procreate. This can result in an impact on demographic figures, as can be seen in european countries today (I'm not implying that this is the only cause behind our disastrous birthrates).

I think of morality not as eternal values, but as a set of shared rules of conduct that help society to function better. Following this definition (that I just made up, don't take it too seriously), it would be immoral.

[Salford]

In my case, premarital sex definitely did more harm than good, even within the confines of a committed relationship. Being somewhat naive and trusting, I was adversely affected. I try not to dwell on it, but it certainly prevented me from establishing a good marriage. For me, at least, a sacramental marriage would be the only proper arena for sexual activity.

[Weltschmerz]

I think the actual act can wait until you are wed before God, but I would not marry a woman who does not want to fondle me rather eagerly. My experience is that a woman does not appreciate equally as much to be fondled, but there are other ways of loving a woman. I accept that it is my part to be a gentleman, and, of course, quite a lot of special attention should be reserved along with all rights to the one woman you love. It would perhaps even be a sin to treat her like any woman, just like it would be a sin for a woman to treat the man like any man and call it love.

[Strengthandhonour]

I don't think there is anything wrong with it.
Like Menydh says, if it is practiced within a close relationship then I think it is perfectly fine. I think it's also becoming more rare to find people who wait until they are married as well. An Irish girl I knew who was a devoted catholic always told me she would wait. She cracked like 4 weeks ago and finally did it. I was quite surprised to be honest.
I see a lot of people saying it is harmful to society and demographics prove it. Can anyone bother to post this demographics? sounds like the ones American schools show to teach children about abstinence and ignore the concept of birth control.

[Phlegethon]

I think it is a general trend of the 20th and 21st century. Vows are temporary, promises get broken on a daily basis. Since the civilian marriage got introduced the respect for the institution marriage has been destroyed. And even those who get married in church on top of that have no comprehension that it is the only sacrament which man bestows onto the other before God.

[Weltschmerz]

Originally Posted by Strengthandhonour

I see a lot of people saying it is harmful to society and demographics prove it. Can anyone bother to post this demographics? sounds like the ones American schools show to teach children about abstinence and ignore the concept of birth control.

There is no such way of proving it, and I think that statistics can be a rather silly science anyway. But you can look at history and see what "emancipation" and promiscuity has done to every society that ever encouraged it. I don't think that you can ask for any better evidence than that. The point is that for as long as promiscuity is socially unacceptable, people will be a lot more inclined to form stable families. I include the sexual relationships of "serial monogamy" in promiscuity for the sake of this discussion, since that's really what they are if you take a look at it from a distance. And, as it is often said, methods of birth control are not entirely new to us after all. A society can restrict their availability and make sure that its institutions have nothing to do with them in order to mark further that promiscuity is not acceptable, but our societies have done the opposite of that.