[Aptrgangr]

Almost anytime we Germans experience a surreal, weird, strange, somehow unreal siuation IRL, we say "I think I am in the wrong movie right now". This thread is about our "in the wrong movie" experiences, let me start.

1.)I had to buy a new ID card, 20 € for a wortless piece of plastic is cheaper than 200€ for not having it when controlled by cops. So I went to the office and enqueued. I noticed I was the only German in the queue, except a blonde girl doing the formularies for her negro boyfriend. At the walls there were pics of negroes and Muslims, and description how not to use a dark background for passport photos, and how to tie the headscarf properly. That is the customer orientated service they always talk about, I thought, and noticed my type no longer really is in demand - somehow I had the feeling of being in the wrong movie.

2.)I took the train from Mannheim to Frankfurt. Usually there is lots of foreign folks crowding the train, but I was lucky and found an empty compartment. My luck did not last for long as an Albanian clan was entering the compartment, a man sat down vis-à-vis to me, his about 5 years old son on his lap. Suddenly he opened the zipper of his son's trouser, pulled out his penis and started to rub his foreskin. I had a very strong feeling of being in the wrong movie right now and I wouldn't have been too surprised if he had started cicumcizing him in front of me...

3.) In the tram home, it was late but except some wiggers in the front the tram was empty. At a station a gang of Muslim thug girls, commanded by an athlectic negro girl, entered the tram. Immediately they started beating up the wiggers in the front (the driver did nothing), stealing their baseball-caps, slapping them in their faces etc. I observed the situation from the background, wondering who actually was the strong gender, and who was not, and how pathetic these wiggers were - dressed like MTV gangsta thugs but not even started any attempt to defend themselves. It was an unpleasant surprise for me when the girls stopped molesting the wiggers and turned their attention towards me in the rear. They came to the rear compartment and encircled me. I was sitting with my back to the window, next to the door, so I had my back free and I was ready to jump and hit. I was keen to find out whether they were armed or not, I thought "girls if you do not finish me quickly with any arms this was your last day, I am not one of those pathetic 15 yo wiggers". I am no super-athlete, rather a veteran with some scars knowing a real hit and kick causes demoralizing pain. Surprisingly the girls had no intention to attack me. The beefy jungle queen was interested in a small talk and sex, she noticed I was not really impressed but rather worried one of her minions could have a hidden knife somewhere. Anyway, they left the tram at the central staion, where more of their sort were lurking, I just thought I was in a wrong movie right now and the things could have had escalated.

4.) I enjoyed a walk when I saw a strange looking family. The husband was very ugly- I know, beauty is in the eye of the beholder - but this guy was a living Hunchback of Notre Dame type, with a deformed set of teeth, knock-kneed and glasses thick like loupes. His wife wasn't much prettier, an overweighted albino woman, having glasses thick as loupes too. Well, the two children inherited all the best genes, these were knock-kneed, overweighted albino kids with deformed sets of teeth and loupe-like glasses. And all of them were cross-eyed! I vowed to take genetics more seriously and was not sure whether to be happy having no camera, or not, anyway I had the feeling of being in the wrong movie.

5.) Like almost always I slept with my windows slightly open. Suddenly a rough sounding chorus started chanting the 1st stanza of the Deutschlandlied - "Deutschland Deutschland über alles". I had a look at my watch, it said 1.30.am, so I went to the window to have a look on who is singing there. There was a bunch of Croatian (football?) fans walking down the street singing - far away from any sports stadium. After they had finished the text they had learned by heart, they shouted "Hrvatska Hrvatska" and started singing it again. So they disappeared into the night. I was amused but still had the feeling of being in the wrong movie.